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Welcome to Amanda Green’s website

My Alien self my journey back to me Amanda Green e book cover march 2012 My name is Amanda Green (pseudonym), I was born and live in England, UK,  and I set up this website and wrote two memoirs  to share with my readers the stories of my issues with mental illness, therapy and recovery. I also write thought provoking, inspiring fiction with the theme of overcoming adversities (abuse, homelessness, mental health, relationships and more)

Join my MAILING LIST‘ by clicking the link on the right hand side of this website.

Subscribe to Amanda Green author by email and you will receive an email each time I publish a new article to the site, to keep you up to date.

I regularly post blogs about coping strategies, inspirational things to do, Borderline Personality disorder, depression, Obsessive compulsive disorder, schizophrenia, anxiety/panic attacks, thyroid issues, eating disorders (Anorexia Nervosa and Bulimia), alcohol and drug abuse, sexual abuse/rape, Quetiapine (Seroquel anti-psychotics) and Citalopram (anti-depressant), therapies such as Cognitive behavioural therapy and paranoia, dissociation and psychosis – all of which I have experienced in one way or another either myself or those I know.  Also info on mental health charities, forums,  campaigns, the stigma surrounding mental illness, some of my personal experiences, celebrities with mental health issues and mental health in the family.

My logo is a locked box and this is because one of the main things I had to do to heal myself was to deal with adverse things that have happened to me in my past and my aim was to put them in a ‘pandoras box’, close the lid on them and lock them away, so that I could forgive and forget the past and concentrate on the future.

Amanda Green pandora box logo

Amanda Green pandora box logo

I realised that holding onto the past was harming me in the present time and it had to stop. Therefore, I decided this would be an apt logo for me to share and be recognised with. Plus green is for ‘go’ (‘go for it’ I thought) and is also my pen name.

You will see the main feature on the ‘My Alien Self : My Journey Back to Me’ book cover is a keyhole in keeping with the locked away bad memories theme…

Read about my book  My Alien Self – My Journey Back To Me by CLICKING HERE. To view or purchase any of my books click on the links to Amazon on the right.  Both memoirs are available as paperback and all are on kindle, but the GREAT news is that you do not need a Kindle reader to read kindle books Find out more by CLICKING HERE

I have also added a sample of my writing – see it by CLICKING HERE  and a small piece from my book about my mum and dad – CLICK HERE :-)

My personal website is SandraMDean …….Continue reading Welcome to Amanda Green’s website…

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If in doubt, do things you enjoy

“I am not worthy”

rainbow sunset

rainbow sunset

“Their needs are bigger than mine”

“I don’t have time!

“I don’t have spare money”

Just a few of the negative things we may say to ourselves when thinking about doing something for ourselves. Thinking like this can make us feel even more unworthy.

But, it’s not really good enough is it? We should look after ourselves and our minds.

If we don’t relax and give ourselves some time in our day, we might frazzle, burn out, get bored, resent others…

Now, as we know, some hobbies or things we may enjoy may take up quite a bit of time, such as boating, visiting art galleries or stately homes, hiking, judo, shopping, a college course in drawing, cooking or learning a language… but they could be very fulfilling.

On the other hand, if you are a very busy person already, you might try practising mindfulness, meditation or just sitting and giving yourself a few minutes to think of nothing. Often you will find that something random and interesting will come to mind. I find my creativity is at its peak and I find answers to things I have been worrying about, if I just …….Continue reading If in doubt, do things you enjoy…

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Three weeks and four days… Mum and being positive, a poem

OK here goes another ditty, poem, rhyme; whatever you want to call it. Don’t expect a great poem, just a little story about the

My plants May 2015

My plants May 2015

last three weeks and four days…

 

Three weeks, four days, it has passed so fast

Made me feel unreal at times, like I was wearing a mask

Mum was first in intensive care, it was really touch and go

Her lungs were punctured, atrial fibrulation; her heart was fast and slow

She looked so frail and small in bed, sedatives keeping her calm and asleep

We thought the worst, we thought too much, and many tears I did then weep

But she got through, and she was moved, the trauma ward, where she could rest

She was confused, teary and annoyed, she also felt like she was a pest …….Continue reading Three weeks and four days… Mum and being positive, a poem…

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Re-launching ‘Behind Those Eyes’ Life on the streets of London; re-edited, on paperback and with a new cover!

Behind Those Eyes front cover

Behind Those Eyes front cover

I am very excited about re-launching ‘Behind Those Eyes’ a kindle book I published in 2014. Its new name is ‘Behind Those Eyes: Life on the streets of London’, it has a brand new cover, and is now available as a paperback as well as an e-book.

Aidana Willow designed the new cover; some links to it on her blogs can be viewed by CLICKING HERE and HERE and HERE (all open in a new window)

Check out the new cover on Amazon:

Amazon UK CLICK HERE

Amazon COM CLICK HERE

It’s full of twists and turns and hopefully the story will surprise you!

Storyline: Two homeless men, a successful brother and sister, a woman falling in love, a man with family problems, a policeman and a whole lot of twists in this ‘sliding doors’ style novella. It’s a story about people and adversity, love, friendship and stigma. Will you work out what they have in common?

It’s a work of fiction, but is my favourite of all my books so far, as researching and writing it was so very humbling and interesting. I now work with homeless people, and my message is the same as with mental health issues and elderly – do not judge or stigmatise. People become homeless for such a …….Continue reading Re-launching ‘Behind Those Eyes’ Life on the streets of London; re-edited, on paperback and with a new cover!…

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My first author event – the Essex Author Extravaganza in Southend on Sea, Essex!

essex author extravaganza 2016

essex author extravaganza 2016

I will be taking part as a signing author with a table all of my own for the first time next year!

The event ‘Essex Author Extravaganza’ will take place 25th and 26th June 2016.

I will be there both days, so if you fancy coming it would be lovely to meet you!

For the Essex Author Extravaganza website please CLICK HERE (opens in a new window)

To buy tickets on-line please CLICK HERE (opens in a new window)

And please CLICK HERE for the ESSEX Author Extravaganza 2016 facebook page

There will be authors from all over, signings, freebies, books to purchase and much more and is being held at the Cliffs Pavillion Theatre in Southend-on-Sea, Essex which is a lovely venue with great views of the Estuary :-)

If you are not familiar with my books, you can view any of them by clicking the links on the right of this site (6 books so far) or checking me out on Goodreads (CLICK HERE) Amazon UK (CLICK HERE) or Amazon.COM (CLICK HERE)

 

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Mindfulness, a poem, relaxation and living in the moment

A ditty, poem, rhyming verse, whatever you want to call it, that I just made up about mindfulness and living in the

bourgainvillea

bourgainvillea

moment… (N.B. Although I love writing, this type of writing is not my forte, so don’t expect too much please :-) It was also written in a few minutes, but I don’t feel the need to work too hard on it as it’s the message that counts)

Stressed to my hilt, about my parents health and care

I went to Portugal with Chris, and I managed to chill out there

For the first time, in many years, I left all my troubles behind

As I practised relaxation skills, it’s about ‘training of your mind’

‘Being in the moment’ is somewhere many of us are not at

We like our technology, a fast paced life, materialism and all that

Mobile phones, we can’t stop texting, telly on while we try to eat

It’s no wonder we don’t think constructively, so many challenges we must meet …….Continue reading Mindfulness, a poem, relaxation and living in the moment…

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The only green eyes in my life now are my cat’s!

Jealousy – there’s nothing nice about it. Not for the jealous person, nor for the

Titus my cat in the sink

Titus my cat in the sink

recipient.

I have been jealous. I have felt the rage wanting to erupt from my insides. I have even been incapable of covering it up with some people in my past. It has wrecked friendships and made me look completely self centred. But then, I probably was at the time.

However, it has just occurred to me that I no longer suffer with the green eyed monster bubbling away inside of my being. Why? Well, I had to think about that a little, and discuss it too, to clarify my thoughts…

Having dealt with many of my inner demons of mood swings, depression, anger, …….Continue reading The only green eyes in my life now are my cat’s!…

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The subject of age – how much do we really think about the elderly and getting older? Empathy or ignorance? And what about us?

I am being forced, if you like, to think about age. Together with ‘death’, and ‘time’, it’s another topic I usually try to

41

Me at 41

avoid. They make me anxious, sad and far too thoughtful. But, my parents are ageing quickly, it seems, since losing certain things in their lives and being forced out of their denial of their age. It is sad, but true.

Dad has been going through depression, and now my mum is depressed amongst other things, like forgetting a lot. She feels like giving up. And so, in trying to think of things they have worth living for, and doing my counselling course which gets me thinking a lot now about others (especially how to empathise and not be judgemental), age has been a subject close to mind for a few weeks now.

I realised that I can empathise with teenage angst, for example, because I have lived it. I have been there and …….Continue reading The subject of age – how much do we really think about the elderly and getting older? Empathy or ignorance? And what about us?…

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The significance of time, mindfulness, past, present, future, counselling, fate and yoga

I don’t know about you, but I have a bit of an issue with ‘Time’.

I have been researching Multicultural counselling for my course, and when I got to the section on the ‘Significance of time’ it made me stop and think… quite a lot.

My cactus flowering in 'it's own time'

My cactus flowering in ‘it’s own time’

I have quite a few issues with the huge significance of time in this Western World of ours:

  • I do not like to see clocks and I do not wear a watch
  • I hate to hear a clock tick tock (ing) my life away
  • I have an issue with the future death of significant others, so knowing a person’s age (despite loving to celebrate birthdays; yep contradiction there), each year getting a year older, increases my fear.
  • I feel like ‘time is running out’ – to have babies, to be the person I want to be etc.
  • I have to check my diary to see what I am doing this week, today etc
  • Time adds pressure to my life, I feel. I am sure I would enjoy life more without having the constraints of time. I would drop in and see friends without an appointment, I would feel more free…

In traditional cultures, the focus is on the ‘here and now’ and the ‘past’. In Western cultures, the focus is on the ‘future’. It is no wonder, then, that I take from the Buddhist culture (mindfulness) and the Hindu culture (yoga) to …….Continue reading The significance of time, mindfulness, past, present, future, counselling, fate and yoga…

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My 5 star book review of ‘Attic of the Mind’ by Hemmie Martin – a fantastic read!

Attic of the Mind by Hemmie Martin

Attic of the Mind by Hemmie Martin

Well, well I have found myself a favourite author I believe! I have just finished ‘Attic of the Mind’ by Hemmie Martin; a book which I found myself actively trying not to finish because I was so gripped and intrigued!

Attic of the Mind is a psychological thriller about revenge, love and manipulation. It’s dark, violent, and gripping to the point that I was gasping as I read in places and in awe of the beautiful ‘turns of phrase’ in others. If I could write a book like this and magic up such ideas, I would be very proud of myself indeed, so thanks Hemmie, and well done!

So, if you’d like to read something twist filled, to keep you on the edge of your seat, and with characters you will care about, then I highly recommend you read this book.

I am going to read more by this author!

5* all the way. :-)

To buy the book in the UK, see Hemmie’s Amazon AUTHOR page CLICK HERE

To buy the book on Amazon.com, see Hemmie’s author page by CLICKING HERE

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I start my counselling placement next week – finally feeling proud of myself!

I was just saying this week how looking back at the times my mental health issues were at their worst and I was out

My first memoir

My first memoir

of control, seems surreal and it’s like watching a fiction film in my mind – a nightmarish story at times. How far I have come… I begin my counselling placement next week and I am really looking forward to it! I am an integrative counsellor, taught CBT, person-centred and

My sequel memoir

My sequel memoir

psycho-dynamic theories.

I started my first counselling course in September 2012 and I remember it clearly. That formed a part of my sequel memoir ‘39’…

October 2012… I recently enrolled on a college course; ‘AQA Intro to Counselling’ on Mondays … only a couple of hours each week with a few hours’ homework… 

I hope it will all go well for me, as it will be a whole lot different to being indoors working from home in hibernation and solitude a lot of the time. I hope to get on well with my classmates, gain some confidence, and learn in a classroom environment towards qualifications and a new line of work eventually, in the years to come…

I was so nervous to start college at first, thinking… will I get on with people? Will I be able to keep up?  Will I be able to cope with the role plays?  Will I cope with the new academic environment – a place I haven’t been in for many years?  But, luckily, I was too excited about starting the course to worry much and, as usual when it comes to worry anyway, it would have all been for nothing as I loved the classes within minutes of being there. …….Continue reading I start my counselling placement next week – finally feeling proud of myself!…

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